So I have the meaning of life.

Wednesday, August 9, 2006

It's one o'clock in the morning and I just got done watching my first episode of Sex and the City from start to finish. It's probably not the best show to watch a week before I begin a year and a half of full time missionary service to God. Still, I felt compelled to watch it because the main character's name is Carrie. What a mess of lives that show was. Really though- the constant confusion of sex and alcohol in relationships just doesn't really appeal to me (nor does solving the problems with a smoking habit). I guess we all live in confusion in relationships and solve problems with one bad habit or another. But if that's the case, it's simply natural human behavior that doesn't seem very glamorous. There's something better you know? Something bigger than us and all of our pointless tendencies that make us miserable. I'm not the only one to think this way. My beliefs hang there with Mother Teresa, Muhammad, Joseph Smith, and anyone else who's ever bent a knee. What I find magnificant is that this "something bigger" has provided me a way to also be "something bigger." There's a way for me to finally be able to say: "fine, I won't fight with my family anymore. I'll give up these habits that are inevitably causing me unhappiness. I'll save my money, bite my tongue, help a neighbor and make the choice to become bigger than myself." John Mayer put it best when he sang that he's bigger than his body gives him credit for. Why are we so obsessed with tapping into the 90% of brains that we don't use and yet we forcefully shove aside the yearning to tap into the 90% of our spirituality that we don't use? Grab a belief and hang on!
We're better than we are. I know that seems a bit comical but it's true- oh so true. Anyone that tells you that it's okay to live the way you're living is denying your very being! Why would you ever want to stay stagnant?! Remember how good it feels to stretch? I guess what I'm saying is that it kind of sucks to tell yourself to change but it's necessary because in the end (whenever that is) you'll look and see what your life's become and you'll be okay. There'll be moments of rest along the way where you'll know you've been trying as hard as you can to be a better person and something bigger than yourself will tell you that you've done good. I promise that'll happen.
There's a theory that if you look outside yourself, strive to become bigger than yourself, you'll be happy. And if you're happy, others will want to be happy. It can change the world. This theory is also a religion. I'm going to Toronto Canada to help change the world. Because I think we're better than we think we are. And if I can help one person realize their potential, well then I've begun to achieve mine. I know that God has made a way through Jesus Christ for me to be happy. It's all part of this really awesome plan that I'm sure I'll tell you about sometime. It's a perfect plan because it works for everyone. Yeah, even you. Even you when you feel like no one wants you to be happy. Even you when you feel taken advantage of and ignored or used. Even you when you bluntly refuse to follow a plan that will make you happy. It's okay. We'll wait. Because no one wants to be miserable forever.
So here I go. Happy little Carrie Sylvester on her way to Canada to preach a plan of happiness. Wish me luck.
I have the meaning of life. And it's a happy message.

1 comment:

  1. So I'm sitting in a tiny box office, backstage at the Playmill, during "Seven Brides" with tears in my eyes right now. You inspire me so much! The Church is true! You so eloquently expressed so many of the wonderful things I know to be true, and I'm so glad you have the opportunity (and the courage to take advantage of it) to share truth and happiness with everyone around you! Especially in Toronto Canada. I'm so excited for you, and for everyone who will cross your path on your mission to change the world. Rock on, sister.

    "Many of the heroes and redeemers we admire most were unhappy people who found it impossible to change how they felt about the world...which left them no choice but to change the world itself."

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I like to hear all of the beautiful things you have to say.