Where have I been you ask? In self-pity land. You ever been there? It's full of dark caves that aren't dark enough when compared to another dark cave. There are people there who tell you that you can't be a blogger because you don't have a nice camera, or photoshop, or an etsy shop, or clothes worth taking pictures of every day. It's a weird place that makes you magically forget the blessings of family, friends, and the things that matter most in your life and instead focus on the temporary.
But, I can escape self-pity land when I look at my daughter. She is my passport to happiness and light. My husband is my locomotive who gets me moving. I love them.
So let's play catch-up eh?
First, some Christmas cuteness. These were taken by the ever so talented Anna Harrison.Georgia is all decked out for the season in Christmas pajama's and her dress!
She looks like an American Girl doll!
The big bear came from her Aunt Dani and Uncle Kade. I had told my mom not to buy her that bear (seeing as motorized mini-jeeps and oversized stuffed animals are universal symbols of spoiled children), and she agreed... since my sister and brother had ALREADY bought it for her!
Christmas Eve and Day this year was spent with Scott's family, who, luckily, almost all live within 30 minutes of us (we sure did miss Mark, Heather, Charlotte and Ruby)!
It was just Scott, Georgia and I at his parents house on Christmas Eve though and we had a lot of fun. Like, crazy amounts of fun. We ended up staying up until 2 in the morning making a movie that, God willing, NEVER see the light of You-tube. It was crazy fun to make though and we just cracked up through the whole thing.
In the morning, Georgia got an Exer-saucer from Santa. 360 degrees of never ending fun. She has been freaking out ever since :)
I told Scott to hold up his favorite two gifts:
That's an Entertainment book and a Harry Potter 3D Magic Eye book. They may seem random to you, but to Scott, they were tailor made.
My Christmas day was Groupon themed. They all came in envelopes! My favorite one, though was a little letter from Scott telling me he had got us a room in Park City and a gift card to the outlet malls (!) for a "romantic winter getaway." I am so excited!
We went to church, and then spent the rest of Christmas day eating good food, laughing with family, and playing our new Wii games (Wii games are way more fun with nieces who are 2-7 years old). It was all-in-all relaxing and memorable. It's hard being away from my family at Christmas, but I am truly blessed with amazing in-laws that I get along with and who get my sense of humor.
After Christmas, Georgia turned a whopping 6 months old (and weighing in at a whole 13 lbs) aaaand my family came to visit! I was kind of surprised and absolutely thrilled! We got to see the lights at Temple Square with them (something Scott and I had done before Christmas, so it was fun to do it with no crowd) and we also played games and just talked.
For New Years, Scott and I were a bit worn out by all of the people and I wanted to spend the holiday quietly. We went out to eat (with a gift card) and I got STEAK AND LOBSTER for the first time! Then, after I finished a HUGE project that had taken me months, we played Trivial Pursuit while Georgia rolled around naked on the floor (pictures I am NOT going to post, but take my word for it that they are pretty dang cute).
You have never seen more happy or relaxed Chapman's.
At around 11:30, we had fondue (per our annual tradition) and watched the ball drop. I hadn't planned on making a big deal out of 2012 coming, but at midnight, I felt hopeful.
I feel hopeful.
I'm hearing a lot of people around the internet bash on new year's resolutions. But what's wrong with looking at your life and saying: "I can do a little better. I RESOLVE to do a little better" no matter what time of year?
So, I resolve to be happier doing the things I love instead of dragging my feet just because I made the mistake of comparing myself to others. I will create something new, I will blog when I want. I will sing. I may not have a degree in creative writing, or any photography skills, or a singing voice, but it is release that I need. Stay tuned, folks- you'll be hearing from me.
You are beautiful and wonderful and talented and have better writing skills than many of the blogs I've read.
ReplyDeleteNo worries, darlin'... you're just who you should be, and I like her.
Erin just saw me looking at your blog and said "Carrie does such a nice job and it looks so great! How does she do it?!" And she had not even seen what your blog was about. Sooo...Here is to 2012 being filled with wonderful blog posts from Carrie! Love ya!
ReplyDeleteI love you.
ReplyDeleteI went through a similar crisis of self-pity/identity trouble when I first got married. I thought I NEEDED the etsy shop and the cute clothes and the darling decor that I made from ideas I got on Pinterest. While there's nothing wrong with those things at all, I finally realized they're simply not ME. I've got a bead curtain and posters of Janis Joplin in my house. I prefer jeans and a Pearl Jam t-shirt.
And wanna know who helped me remember all that? YOU did. You were such a blessing to me (still are) in my early marriage, because I saw how you were TRUE to yourself despite the major life change of marriage. You crafted and loved Pinterest because you loved them, and not because you were supposed to. I'm so grateful for your example...you're so good at trying new things while staying true to the Carrie inside. =)
So don't let anyone tell you, or make you think, that you have to be anything or anyone else to have value. You are valuable simply because you are a daughter of God. God doesn't value the cute bloggers any more (or less) than He does the Muslim women of Pakistan. If the people around you are placing value on you for your accomplishments, rather than who you are, either set them straight or leave them alone. =)
The point is I love you dearly. I love your resolution. And if anyone can keep a resolution, it's Carrie Chapman.
Wait, did someone say you need all those things to blog?
ReplyDeleteGreat, I suppose me blogging all this time has put me on some sort of blogspot/squarespace/wordpress no-fly list. Which is just the last thing I need.
Hey, Car-bear, we can't all be fashion bloggers. Some of us have to be just regular people who don't have the time or wherewithal to get dressed everyday, nevermind take a photo of that outfit everyday.
So just keep on keepin' on, and I'll do the same, and 2012 will be our year, gf (girlfriend).